This may just liven up your Christmas preparations and help you get into the swing of things!

Ingredients:-

1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
2 cups flour
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
50ml Lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup mixed nuts
1 bottle Vodka
1 can of red bull
2 cups of dried fruit

Method:

- Sample the vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the vodka again. To be sure it is the highest quality, pour one level cup and mix with a little red bull and drink.

- Repeat.

- Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large, fluffy bowl.

- Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the vodka is shtill OK Flavour with red bull to taste.

- Try another cup.... just in case turn off the mixerer. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

- Pick fruit off floor.

- Mix on the turner.

- If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers pry it oose with a screwscriver.

- Sample the vodka to check for tonsisticity - flavour

- Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Sho giveshz a shiit.

- Throw a pinch of Bed Rull over your shoulder.

- Pick up the can, mop the floor

- Check the vodka.

- Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

- Add one table.

- Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

- Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

- Don't forget to beat off the turner.

- Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the vodka and kick the dog.

- Fall into bed.

CHERRY MISTMAS!